Audibles Chasing Lilly

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May 252018
 

Bungy-jumping-nealie-rose-feels-like-this-yay!This is not me bungy-jumping, but I am¬†almost happy enough to do it! Almost. ūüėÄ

Chasing Lilly is now in the Audibles format for those of you who listen to audio books.

And please don’t forget to leave a review if you love it. ūüôā

Also, in case you missed it, I have a new website for Middle Graders (10-14) and a new mystery book, called The Portal in the Attic. This will be a series.

Love my readers, -Nealie

Apr 062018
 

Hi Readers,

We see¬†Lilly weekly, talk to her daily, and take aspirin in between. Just joking -life isn’t that bad, but it is¬†more than¬†interesting!

Lilly is our daughter -a heart adoption, and we love her so much. Eighteen years and counting.

Good things are happening, and some changes are coming to the blog.

It will be biweekly, with one week devoted to talking about all things Lilly. Two weeks later¬†I’ll post a partial chapter from Chasing Lilly so that new readers to the site can get to know¬†her. ūüôā

My focus now is the Audibles book being completed, as well as you connecting with Lilly as much as possible. So many people can learn from her.

Chasing-Lilly-Nealie-Rose

 

Feb 162018
 

Yes-No-Syndrome-Nealie-RoseI’ve seen enough of¬†a syndrome¬†to give it a name! One of Lilly’s new doctors called me and asked what her diagnoses were. I rattled them off and added, “And there’s one that I made up, but it affects everything Lilly does.”

I give the doctor kudos because she could have ignored me. This curious doctor actually asked what it was!

I replied something like, “I call it the Yes/No Syndrome. When everything goes well, and Lilly gets a yes everytime she wants something, the world is a lovely place. But when¬†she gets a¬†no, the world can be an ugly place for everyone around her. She doesn’t take no’s well.¬†(Remember the tossed dresser and a broken window in Chasing Lilly, because I told her she had to wait for a brownie until after dinner?)

The Yes/No Syndrome exists because she doesn’t have all the resources she needs for coping. She has legitimate anxiety and discomfort when she hears a no. And it can be overwhelming to her.

I spoke to¬†Lilly’s therapist the other day about¬†my made-up diagnosis, and asked if there was a way to help Lilly get used to taking no’s. I mentioned that the last time Lilly was at my house she saw a tiny peppermint on the counter and asked if she could have it. I could easlily have said yes, but didn’t because I thought maybe we should practice, and¬†begin really small. ūüôā

Lilly was surprised I said no to the mint, and she was uncomfortable for a few seconds but was able to get past it.¬†I would never before have said no to a tiny mint. We’ve all been told to “pick¬†your battles,” so we gave Lilly a yes whenever possible.

Lilly’s therapist is terrific and said she would begin to work with Lilly on¬†accepting no’s¬†as a type of conditioning.

I’ve told Lilly that we are going to practice this, and she recognizes that she has a problem with¬†accepting a no,¬†because¬†of concrete examples, such as, “Remember the time you got mad because of this¬†particular no,¬†and you broke the TV? How could it have been different if you accepted the no?” (Answer: I¬†would have had a TV.) I don’t think it would be good to give many examples, because we have to stress that kids like Lilly are not bad people because they can’t get their act together, and they need to know that.

Ending on a funny note, Lilly’s new doctor called me (laughing), and¬†said, “We are seeing the Yes/No Syndrome, Mrs. Rose!”

Love my readers, -Nealie