Lilly has made a great friend, and he has also been her boyfriend for about 5 months.
Dustin (not his real name) is on the same residential campus as Lilly, but in a different building. Dustin has a disability as well, and behavioral issues, but he and Lilly are on the same level when it comes to shooting the breeze and having some fun.
They have been able to have “dates” on campus in a pavilion, where Lilly brings some pizza or snacks and they eat and talk for a couple hours and sometimes play basketball.
Dustin has proposed to Lilly, and she said yes. Then she changed her mind. Lilly wonders how they could live without staff helping them, and also wonders if Dustin would be able to keep her safe. Pretty remarkable that she would consider such important things, huh?
You may have 20 questions right now, but this is beyond me…who would have thought? I doubt it could work out, but I don’t want to voice that to her. Better she reach that conclusion on her own. I just try to listen.
Lilly wants all the things that other young women want. She wants to work a job, drive a car, find love, etc. And she gets sooooo angry when she sees that life has dealt her an unfair hand when it comes to realizing her dreams.
When you think of Lilly, say a prayer for her.
Lilly was able to come for a home visit after 14 months of being pretty much stuck at her facility because of covid. She was only off-campus for doctor and dentist appointments.
It was nice having her here! Lilly had never seen this current home because we moved during her lock-down. She’d been able to get a feel for where we now live through DUO face-to-face calls. Thank goodness for technology like that.
We still had to make sure there were no scissors, knives, pill bottles, etc. anywhere in sight before she arrived. That doesn’t change no matter where we live.
Her first request was to see her “Life Book.” In Chasing Lilly I wrote about how CHC required foster parents to make one for each child, and how much it has meant to Lilly over these 21 years.
While examining and commenting on the pictures, Lilly asked if she could take it with her when she left.
Hmmm, now that was a hard question. I’d love to hand it over to her. But any and every time I have given her duplicate pictures, (which has been quite a few times), the photos disappear. Forever.
I have no idea what has become of them, but suspect that she rips them up when she’s mad, or they get swept up in the trash when her room is cleaned out.
I’m not about to turn the book over to her yet, so I told Lilly that she could take it with her when she had gone a year without any major violence. That seems like a long time (and it is), but the only photographic history that exists of her life is not going into the trash because I go soft.
My official title is Guardian of the Person, but I guess I’m also Guardian of the Book.
Love my Readers, -Nealie